So, I just read a great blog article by Single Dating Diva on Courting the Courtesan. It reminds me that sometimes we women are so intent on keeping the rights we have and gaining even more equality, that we forget what equality means.
What does equality mean? Mirriam-Webster defines it as : the quality or state of being equal.
Sigh. Well that helps, doesn't it? So, I looked up equal. It had more:
1. a : of the same measure, quantity, amount, or number as another (2) : identical in mathematical value or logical denotation : equivalent
b : like in quality, nature, or status
c : like for each member of a group, class, or society <provide equal employment opportunities>
2 : regarding or affecting all objects in the same way : impartial
3 : free from extremes: as
a : tranquil in mind or mood
b : not showing variation in appearance, structure, or proportion
4 a : capable of meeting the requirements of a situation or a task
b : suitable <bored with work not equal to his abilities>
Okay, so maybe my definition of equality is a bit different than Mirriam-Webster. Or, maybe I need to come up with my own word. I have been known to do that before.
To me, being part of a relationship does not mean we are necessarily 'equal' - if you take MW's definition. I do not have the same jobs as my partner, nor he mine. Nor are we the same. We each bring our own individual likes, dislikes, needs and wants into the relationship. If we have the same goals, then what I enjoy doing is what he dislikes doing, etc. I need a strong, dominant, intelligent man who already has control of his own life and wishes to take control of mine as well.
Now, for the real question - why is that looked down upon in our society? If in a job, yes I expect same pay for same work. In a relationship, are we both equally important? YES. Otherwise, the equality ratio seems a bit skewed to me.
But, I actually got off the topic I wanted to talk about after reading Single Dating Diva's article. About the concept of The Kept Woman.
A rather old-fashioned concept, a kept woman would have been considered a rich single man's mistress a few hundred years ago. Of course today, many would shake their head and look down upon the concept, but I ask, why? What is wrong with such an exchange?
The man pays for her house, her bills, her clothes, her travel. She gives her sexual favors to him and him only.
Seriously, in today's fast-paced world, it sounds like a nice arrangement. She lives her own life, does her own thing; she is actually autonomous. They make 'dates' and times when he can see her, but she is no doormat, nor is she under his constant command... unless that is what they chose.
Some may say she gets all the perks, but what does he get? A relationship with no strings. He doesn't have to worry that she will be begging for a ring, nor does he have to find someone to take to his next business dinner. She is very much the Courtesan, highly intelligent, able to keep up a good conversation while looking perfect on his arm.
I see their relationship as equal, in that they both are getting what they want out of the deal. Some would disagree and that's fine. I never said my brain worked the same as anyone else's.
Read Single Dating Diva's article. It has some great tips on how to treat your 'someone'. For they should be treated special. There is a reason courtesans were sought after and if you look around, still are.